Friday, August 18, 2006

Main aur meri tanhayee...

...aksar yehi baatein karte hai ki, "Why the fk are we in Chennai?"

There are times when you feel that your life has gone so bad, it could not possibly get any worse. At these times, you wish to do something, hoping that you would enjoy a moment of madness in the midst of sanity (or is it the other way round?). But heck, my life in Chennai still searches for that moment!

I have been in Chennai for close to 2 months now. My initial reaction about Chennai was, "Hmm, nice city, but where are the PYTs?" Alas, I was to realize over the next few days, that there are no PYTs to be found in Chennai. Infact, and I am not exaggerating a bit, kgp had more PYTs than Chennai. Ok then, I said to myself, lets only try to look for YTs. Alas, their numbers didnt suggest much encouragement either. If Steven Levitt had gone through this statistic, he may have probably attributed this to good birth control rates two decades back in Chennai. But the story is a lot different. I have talked to many youths who live in Chennai, or even the guys who live in any of the 4 southern states. Even the majority of them said, they want to leave Chennai. Where will the numbers come from then?

Having given up on my search for the PYTs, I decided to look for the PWT (w for wild), a.k.a. booze. Tell you what, had there been no tharra shops, Chennai would have been probably drier than Gujarat (and no exaggeration here either). Ok, you may search over the internet and probably say that there are pubs in Chennai dude, but tell me, is it possible to spend 130 bucks on a bottle of king fisher beer (or possibly even more) everytime you want to drink? The regular "wine shops", as the liquor stores are called here, sell, as I said, tharras only! Now that would be stooping too low, and please I dont want to venture there! It was this situation, which compelled me to go on a trip to Pondicherry with 3 other kgp-ians. That was my only moment of enjoyment in Chennai, which, ironically, was not in Chennai.

Now coming to the climax of my story. This weekend I decided to try out the only bar in Anna Nagar (thats where I stay, which is supposed to be one of the poshest in Chennai, and where, apparently, you can enjoy the city life! Hic!). The place was called Skypark (no similarity with the Park kgp knows of). The place smelt of stinky southie y-ass. A bottle of beer was priced, as I said, Rs 130. Ok, I said to myself, maybe the service would be good. But "O Heart, Heart Heart/ O the bleeding drops of Red", coz there on my table lies, a beer warm and, possibly, stale! Thats when you think your life can never get any worse, and thats when the complimentary arrives - 4 slices of cucumber (mind you we were 2 people drinking), an iota of something ( i dont know what it was!), one bowl of ubla hua chana, and to top this amazing menu - one plate rasam vada! Thats what I call a typical "MTV - One Tight Slap!" moment.

This is the city I live in friends, and this is the city, where I would be living in till for God knows when. Please, "kabhi chennai mat aana".